Reports
by Rakushinu-Watashidomo
Summary: How would you like to read hells reports on the Gotei 13? Especially if they are written by my friend and I.
1. week one

Yamamato-old man

Chojiro- something or other

Soifon- shortie

Omeada- tallie

Gin-fox

izuru-blond emo

unohana-mother

isane-sister

aizen-nutcase

hinamori-love struck

byakuya-captain flower power

renji-mr. compensation

komamura-WOLFIE

iba-UGLY

Kyoraku-cross-desser

Nanao-glasses

Tosen-justice is blind

Hisagi -reaper

Hitsugaya-shit stack

Rangiku-drunkin nut

Kenpachi-drunken rage

Yachiru-nickname

Kurotsuchi-major nutcase

Nemu-chan

Ukitake-illness

Sentaro- thing1

Keyonie-thing2

Report #1

Old Man and Something-or-Other are going through the mountain of red tape.

Shortie is chasing Tallie around screaming about paperwork.

Fox and Blond-emo are nowhere to be found.

Mother and Sister are cleaning up a 'disturbance' (read: 11th division fight)

Nutcase and Love-Struck are in Nutcases' office.

Captain Flower-Power is giving Mr. Compensation more paperwork

WOLFIE is arguing with UGLY

Cross-Dresser is hitting on Glasses. Glasses is (literally) hitting on Cross-Dresser.

Justice-is-Blind is telling his new members to fear their swords. Reaper is rolling his eyes.

ShitStack is lowering his divisions hearing because Drunken Nut was drunk again

Drunken Rage and Nickname are asleep

Major Nutcase is talking to Chan about something. I hate science.

Thing1 and Thing2 are arguing about Illness again.

End Report One

Boss' office

"This is so STUPID!" the boss slammed his hands on his desk. Causing all the paperwork to go flying. "Shit."

Report #2

Old Man and Something-or-Other are still going through the mountain of red tape.

Shortie slept in. Tallie is happy.

Fox and Blond-emo are asleep

Mother and Sister are fixing Drunken Rage and Nickname

Nutcase and Love-Struck are missing

Capitan Flower-Power is pissed and Mr. Compensation is late.

WOLFIE and UGLY are arguing again

Cross-Dresser is with Illness and Glasses is with SWA

Justice-is-Blind is training with Reaper

ShitStack is doing Drunken Nuts paperwork. Drunken nut is with Mr. Compensation. Guess what they're doing?

Major Nutcase is experimenting and Chan is at the SWA meeting with glasses

Thing1 and Thing2 are arguing about Illness' where abuts

End Report Two

Boss' office

He is just staring at it. "Why can't she just write a normal report?" he yells. Making sure not to hit his desk. His stacks of paperwork still fell to the floor.

Report #3

Old Man and Something-or-Other took a break for lunch for the first time in three days. They never came back…

Shortie is doing paperwork and Tallie is no where to be found.

Fox and Blond-emo are training in their unused stadium.

Mother and Sister went with the SWA on vacation

Captian Flower-Power is not here. He is at a noble thing.

WOLFIE is gone. UGLY is doing the paperwork

Cross-Dresser is sad because Glasses is at the SWA vacation.

Justice-is-Blind is….somewhere. Reaper is training with some new members.

ShitStack is yelling and Drunken Nut for not doing paperwork.

Drunken Rage is playing Tea Party with Baldy, Feathers, and Nickname

Major Nutcase is somewhere. Chan is with the SWA.

Thing1 and Thing2 are arguing about what Illness should eat.

End Report Three

Boss' office

"RAKUSHINU!" he yells. The paperwork falls to the floor.

Report #4

Old Man And Something-or-Other are back climbing the mountain of red tape.

Shortie is in a family meeting. Tallie is doing paperwork.

Fox is missing. Blond-emo is doing paperwork.

Mother and Sister are doing paperwork

Love-Struck is doing paperwork. Nutcase is talking with Justice-is-Blind

Captain Flower-Power is doing paperwork then gave half of his load to Mr. Compensation.

WOLFIE is doing paperwork. UGLY is out training with Baldy

Cross-Dresser is back to hitting on Glasses. Glasses is (slowly failing) to ignore him.

Reaper is still training new members.

ShitStack is gone. Drunken Nut is slowly turning into Drunken Rage

Drunken Rage is training with Feathers. Nickname disappeared

Major Nutcase is somewhere and Chan went to find Glasses

Illness went to find Cross-Dresser and thing1 went somewhere, thing2 went to find Sister.

Additional Notes: over all, I think they found out about me.

End Report Four

Boss' office

"If you get found out, you are fired!" he yelled, sending the mountain of paperwork to the floor for the fourth day in a row. "I should have listened to everyone when they called her 'Bad Luck Rakushinu'"

Report #5

Old Man And Something-or-Other didn't show

Shortie and Tallie didn't show

Fox and Blond-emo didn't show

Mother and Sister didn't show

Nutcase and Love-Struck didn't show

Captain Flower-Power and Mr. Compensation didn't show

WOLFIE and UGLY didn't show

Cross-Dresser and Glasses didn't show

Justice-is-Blind and Reaper didn't show

ShitStack and Drunken Nut didn't show

Drunken Rage and NickName didn't show

Major Nutcase and Chan didn't show

Illness, Thing1 and Thing2 didn't show.

Additional Notes: Yep they found out about me.

End Report five

Boss' office

Writing letters to the captains of the Gotie 13. "I will murder Rakushinu."

Report #6

All captains went to there offices to find birds of various species with apology notes.

Today's' report is me giving them there notes and tier reaction.

All were surprised or killed the poor bird. Except Captain Flower-Power. He still has a stickup his ass.

End Report six

Boss' office

He's staring at it. He then puts his head in his hands and sighs.

Then the paper(small this time I think he learned to read my reports last!) fell to the floor. He starts to cry.

Report #7

Old Man And Something-or-Other are arguing over paperwork.

Shortie is yelling at Tallie about ethics

Fox and Blond-emo are running around trying to find me.

Mother and Sister are fixing Nutcase and Love-Struck. I ran into them running from Fox and Blond-emo.

Captain Flower-Power almost caught me with the pink flowery bankai of doom(NOT MINE). Mr. Compensation helped neither were worth my shikai.

WOLFIE and UGLY are arguing about who I am and if I am a guy.

Cross-Dresser is asleep on the roof and Glasses just found him. Ouch. She hit him in the nads with an English text book. Did i mention they weigh eight pounds?

Justice-is-Blind is staring at Reaper as he does paperwork.

ShitStack has the flu(amazing isn't it?). Drunken Nut is actually doing paperwork. Mr. Compensation walked in seen her and started screaming "It's the end of the world!"

Drunken Rage is asking Nickname for directions. Baldy and Feathers are sparing

Major Nutcase managed to get a small picture of me(Read :my arm). Chan is out looking… for someone. I missed that part when I went to delete the picture.

Thing1 and Thing2 wont leave Illness 'unprotected' while a 'vigilantly' runs amock.

Additional notes: over all very funny. Will be switching with Sayuri for next week.

End Report seven

"Thanks for taking over Sayuri!" I yelled as I ran and waved. "don't kill anyone unless it's with a lazor!"

"Not going to make any promises, Rakushinu!" Sayuri yelled back.

Boss' office

"Thank god!" he yelled and slammed his hands on his desk. Nothing fell. "she can't be that BAD!"


	2. week two

Week two Sayuri

Report 1

Old Man and Something-or-Other are filling out paperwork

Shortie is yelling at Tallie for something or other (not to be confused with the person)

Fox is filling out paperwork (and creeping me out) and Blond-emo is nowhere to be found

Mother and Sister are training in the unused field

Cross-Dresser is hitting on Glasses who is in turn is failing at ignoring him

Nutcase is filling out paperwork Love-Struck is…singing?

Captain Flower-Power is acting high and mighty. Mr. Compensation is training his bankai

WOLFIE is arguing with UGLY

Justice-is-Blind is yelling at Reaper for something

ShitStack is chasing Drunken Nut for not doing the paperwork

Drunken Rage is looking for a fight and Nickname is laughing crazily

Major Nutcase is creeping me out and I missed what Chan was doing

Illness is sick again. Thing1 and Thing2 are arguing

End report #1

Boss' office

"Why do I keep getting the crazy people?" he yelled. Wind swept through his window making the papers hit the ground. "Damnit!"

Report two

Old Man and Something-or-Other disappeared.

Shortie is pissed and Tallie is laughing

Fox creeps me out too much and Blond-emo is doing paperwork

Mother is with Sister somewhere unknown

Nutcase is somewhere and Love-Struck is upset

Captian Flower-Power is at some noble thing again. Mr. Compensation is doing the paperwork

WOLFIE is pissed UGLY is running

Justice-is-Blind is sitting boredly. Reaper is pissed and doing the paperwork.

ShitStack is trying to get Drunken Nut sober and Drunk nut is hitting on ShitStack

Drunken Rage is sleeping and Nicknames is running around

Major Nutcase wants to experiment on Chan

Illness is drinking tea with a surprisingly calm Thing1 and Thing2

Glasses is beating the shit out of Cross-Dresser

End Report two

Boss' office

He sighs and he slams his hands on the deck and the stapler falls off. "Oh come on!"

Report Three

CHAOS

End Report three

Boss' office

"What the hell?" he looked out the window and fell off his chair. "This place is cursed."

Report four

Old Man and Something-Or-other are still gone

Shortie is threatening Tallie

I've stopped watching Fox. Blond-emo is filling out papers

Mother is gone. Sister is distraught.

Love-Struck is singing, again? Nutcase is somehow missing it.

Captain Flower-Power is yelling at Mr. Compensation.

WOLFIE is somewhere with UGLY.

Justice-is-Blind is failing at trying paperwork and Reaper is trying not to laugh.

Drunken Nut is getting pissed about ShitStack hiding her sake. (why is all the run gone?)  
Drunken Rage just ran through the tenth division's wall again. Nicknames is laughing.

Major Nutcase scared me and Chan is filing papers.

Illness is trying to train.

Thing1 and thing2 are arguing.

Additional notes: I think Major Nutcase seen me.

End report four

Boss' office

"Shit" he spun around in his chair to face his desk. Suddenly his desk fell on its side. "how is that possible?"

Report #5

"...MY EYES!"

Still have trouble seeing but Shortie looked pissed and Tallie looked proud.

Blond-emo is talking to Fox.

Mother is still gone and Sister is freaking out.

Love-Struck is teasing ShitStack and Nutcase is messing with his bankai. (You don't want to know)

Captain Flower-Power just broke his zanpakuto. Wait it's suppose to do that…Mr. Compensation is compensating.

WOLFIE has lost hhis head bucket basket thing and UGLY is gone.

Justice-is-Blind is trying to kill Reaper for laughing at him.

ShitStack Is drunk and Drunken Nut is sober? (Didn't think that day would come…)

Drunken Rage is pissed about being punished about the wall and Nickname is trying to calm him.

Major Nutcase tried to experiment on me. I ran and missed what Chan was doing.

Illness is yelling at an upset Thing1 and Thing2

Cross-Dresser is ignoring Glasses who is hitting him.

Additional Notes: All hell broke loose today…

End report five

Boss' office

"it seems like it." He sets the report down. And the desk's legs give out. "Damn it to hell!"

I looked at Rakushinu. "I thought we were already there?" She just shrugged her shoulders.

Report #6

Old man and Something-or-Other are doing paperwork.

Shortie is trying to kill Tallie.

I avoided fox, Blond-emo was doing paperwork.

Mother came back and Sister is happy.

Nutcase is doing something with his zanpakuto. Love-Struck is doing paperwork.

Captain Flower-Power is having tea and Mr. Compensation is playing with his bankai.

WOLFIE is pissed at UGLY, again.

Justice-is-Blind is still pissed at reaper.

ShitStack has a hangover and Drunken Nut is laughing.

Drunken Rage burst through the third divisions wall. Nickname is trying to calm him down.

I am avoiding Major Nutcase for my own health.

Illness is sleeping and Thing1 and Thing2 are supposed to be guarding him but they are asleep too.

End Report six

Boss' office

"The 13 court guards squads are going nuts." He tossed the papers onto his desk, preparing for something to happen. Nothing did.

Report #7

Old Man and Something-or-Other are finishing the paperwork.

Shortie has taken a break and is talking to Tallie.

Blond-emo is finishing the paperwork.

Nutcase has his bankai activated again. And Love-Struck is finishing the weeks Paperwork.

Captain Flower-Power is talking to Old Man about something and Mr. Compensation is off somewhere.

WOLFIE is after UGLY.

Justice-is-Blind is working with his zanpakuto and Reaper is off with Baldy and Feathers.

ShitStack is after Drunken Nut for replacing his water with sake.

Drunken Rage is Being chewed out and Nicknames is trying to keep him calm.

Major Nutcase and Glasses are after me

Illness is drinking tea

Thing1 and Thing2 are Training

Cross-Dresser is having the shit beaten out of him by Glasses.

End Report seven

Boss' Office

"Where did the nick names come from?" he laid the weeks reports on his desk and it suddenly tipped forward. "What is wrong with this place?" he yelled.

End Week Two Reports

~Sayuri


End file.
